We're Almost Finished!!!!

First, a word from our Senior Vice President, Cold Pizza:

Cold Pizza

          While bringing important information online, and thus to the universe, the staff of A Stumbling Mass of High-Energy Frustration, although comprised of exemplary humanity, is still merely human. With a heavy heart we concede that we have fallen behind schedule due to lack of pay, and therefore interest. 
          Some of us have obligations to work and school, while others are actually getting paid to write elsewhere. And when one must choose between filthy lucre and nothing, only a philosopher chooses nothing.
         Anyway, I’m sick of you readers. Not only have we been providing you thankless lot with daily pictures of the majestic Wittelsbach Blue Diamond, but we've also been giving you the finest blog this side of the hemisphere, and we haven't seen dime one from you yet. Go to hell, you illiterate yabbos! I'm glad it's over!  Once this blog's debt clears, my future will sparkle like the majestic Wittelsbach Blue Diamond. I can't believe I played the drug-addled stoner for you rabble's merriment. Even the lowliest tumbler recieves coinage for his simpliest summersault! Shall this dancing bear cavort again for your amusement? Never! Like a monkey dazzled by the lustre of the majestic Wittelsbach Blue Diamond, I will leave my lowly organ grinder to cry alone in the street. Who's crying? Both of us. Bah, I am surrounded by Philistines. I--






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Our kind sponsor in debt: The majestic Wittelsbach Blue Diamond Foundation

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And now a prepared statement from our CEO and Chief Editor, Fred Hagemeister:

Freditor enjoying a savory cigarette

      Writing regular articles for the blog has turned out to be much more of a challenge than we first anticipated. We could, like our competitors, write drivel about our personal lives, but do you really care if CP has a love life? (He doesn't.) Or what my favorite brand of mechanical pencil is? (It's the Bic ReAction .5mm, #2 lead, with the smooth, opaque, rubber grip motion. For a while Bic only produced the ReAction with an ostentatiously pastel colored grip. I bought one because my older masculine-looking one died, but I just couldn't get past the flamboyance. Besides being too flashy, it also reminded me too much of candy. Everytime I wrote with it I wanted a Twizzlers. Luckily for my teeth and dignity the ReAction's pastel phase was short-lived.)  
      And sure, we could do like other blogs, and just link to funny things written by someone else, but we feel our readers have always come to us for originality. I mean, original originality. Like the original originality of the majestic Wittelsbach Blue Diamond.
      While we do intend in the future to throw the occasional random scribble on here, any expectation for regular writing should be thrown out the window; along with the furniture.  

ps As you peruse the wreckage that has been our lives for the past year, click on an ad once in a while! We like $$$, it keeps us in furs and horse tranquilizers. This is the only lifestyle we've ever known-don't make us change! Now here's our unflattering, yet honest, imitation of you: "Oh no, my feeble fingers from a lifetime of search-engining cannot deal with the emotional impact of experiencing another banner ad." BOOOOOOOOOOO!!! You people suck. Not you, Wittelsbach Blue Diamond Foundation-you're good people.

Paid for by the Wittelsbach Blue Diamond Foundation. The Wittelsbach Blue Diamond Foundation: we defy you to find a more blue diamond.